Thursday, January 5, 2012
I have not ridden my bike since the last post on Thanksgiving. AND to make matters worse I signed up at a gym- to train- in mixed martial arts combat! I've been hitting people- like hard! And I think I enjoy it!
But I can't help it. I've gotten into it so much that I am doing twice a day work outs until I can't even move the next day and have to take a break. What is happening to me? I am sooo ashamed.
Am I worthy of being called a biker -even though I am probably the only one that calls me that?
Will I ever be accepted into the circle again? Can I face them without wondering what the real bikers are thinking of me? Feeling sorry for me? Or even AFRAID of me? Are they thinking of ways to convert me back (not that I am quitting biking)?
But as I write this at least I feel cleansed. I have been honest with everyone and myself. Maybe I will be accepted for who I am.
Who am I?
Maybe I'll find out this weekend. I am heading down again to St G. Just to ride- no fighting.